valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
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Post by valis on Nov 7, 2020 21:16:13 GMT
A man's testicle where sperm is produced? Your speciality.
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selfy
Star Player
Wessex Dork
Posts: 707
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Post by selfy on Nov 7, 2020 21:37:09 GMT
Underbelly Sneakers 3-0 Angry Vomit
Statement win from the Sneakers this evening. Two headed goblins ran amok and scored at will. The Vomit got angry but had precious little in reply. Consider yourselves warned, there's a new kid in town! Gimfag the two headed, big-handed, mutant gobbo. This boi wanks Nuffle off for fun, with his big, hairy palm! And if that one dies then there's another big-hand shandy already prepared.
The Sneakers time is now!
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valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
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Post by valis on Nov 7, 2020 21:38:10 GMT
Sounds like you're volunteering them for the Bounty List.....
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Post by penkoon on Nov 9, 2020 16:30:44 GMT
Does the lack of an "overall rankings" table this season imply there are no wild-card spots up for grabs this time around? Or am I reading to much into that?
Wondering if you've tweaked the rules after we nearly had the embarrassment of both Nobby and Spleens qualifying...
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wilgutspleens
Star Player
I am suffering from prescient nostalgia....the future's not what it used to be
Posts: 864
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Post by wilgutspleens on Nov 9, 2020 16:42:09 GMT
Does the lack of an "overall rankings" table this season imply there are no wild-card spots up for grabs this time around? Or am I reading to much into that? Wondering if you've tweaked the rules after we nearly had the embarrassment of both Nobby and Spleens qualifying... ....and that can never be allowed to happen! think about it.............
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selfy
Star Player
Wessex Dork
Posts: 707
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Post by selfy on Nov 9, 2020 17:05:56 GMT
Does the lack of an "overall rankings" table this season imply there are no wild-card spots up for grabs this time around? Or am I reading to much into that? Wondering if you've tweaked the rules after we nearly had the embarrassment of both Nobby and Spleens qualifying... ....and that can never be allowed to happen! think about it............. The only thing that you'll be tweaking is the Nipples of Chaos! And fair fucks to ya.
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valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
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Post by valis on Nov 9, 2020 17:11:28 GMT
Does the lack of an "overall rankings" table this season imply there are no wild-card spots up for grabs this time around? Or am I reading to much into that? We've got 6 qualifying divisions this time (5 last time) so no real need for an overall rankings for a wild card spot.
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nobby
Veteran
Prince Chinos
Posts: 445
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Post by nobby on Nov 9, 2020 20:51:56 GMT
ska kings 4 valis rats 1
they might as well have not bothered turning up.
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valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
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Post by valis on Nov 9, 2020 20:56:33 GMT
ska kings 4 valis rats 1 they might as well have not bothered turning up. To be honest, this game has actually put me off buying BB2020.
I had no players halfway through the first half and I was bored out of my mind, just going through the motions.
No game should make you feel like that.
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nobby
Veteran
Prince Chinos
Posts: 445
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Post by nobby on Nov 9, 2020 20:59:37 GMT
its cyanides rng, its utter wank as ive said for years.
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valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
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Post by valis on Nov 9, 2020 21:02:40 GMT
It happens at tabletop too. Many a time I've been sat there bored, or I can see the light go out of my opponent's eyes as they know they've got to sit through two more hours of time-wasting bollocks.
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valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
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Post by valis on Nov 9, 2020 21:05:19 GMT
I was planning on writing a fun match report. I thought: games against nobby are always fun.....
The will be no match report.
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Post by nearly on Nov 9, 2020 22:56:34 GMT
Hunky Spooners 0 - 1 Caimen Isle Excise Dodgers
The first half descended into a fight in the middle of the pitch. Eventually enough Weirdy beardies were on their backs that the ball bounced loose. A skink couldn’t pick it up in time to free it and get it to the end zone, so they made do with hitting things instead.
The second half descended into a fight in the middle of the pitch. Luckily it wasn’t anywhere near the ball carrying skink. The main body of lizards pinned down most of the stunties, however two angry dwarves could pin down the couple of sauri screening the ball. Eventually the skink got bored of waiting for his bigger chums to stop dancing with midgets and made a lone break for the end zone. None of the CAMRA AGM could run fast enough to make a blitz on him, and he slipped their tackles to score.
Even though they had four turns left to equalise, the pony nonces couldn’t organise an orgy in a stables and never threatened the score board. In fact they couldn’t protect the ball and it was only the lack of skinks on the pitch that prevented another defensive touchdown.
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wilgutspleens
Star Player
I am suffering from prescient nostalgia....the future's not what it used to be
Posts: 864
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Post by wilgutspleens on Nov 11, 2020 7:31:20 GMT
The Alliance of Light 3-2 Bastid and the Coonts
"Do not fight the trees! I said it plain enough, right there in the dressing room, do not fight the trees! I told them twice! Thrice! A dozen times do NOT fight the trees!” a perplexed Spleens complained after the game. “Whadtheydo?”
The simple truth is with three trees on the scrimmage line it’s almost impossible to avoid them and when you have a saurus, an ogre and a BOB on the line there's not going to be much dodging away. Even the ogre needed help. He took an injury on the second turn, saved by the apo but obviously had not quite recovered as he bone headed every other turn for the rest of the match.
Rising star Snotling Tweeny McScab was killed in the same turn and by turn 3 the team were down 4 players and morale was low. Tik Tok McBoom managed to fell one of the arboreal monsters with a badly scattered bomb that also took down two of the Coonts but failed to cause an injury.
“They brought a forest! A mother loving forest!” a distraught Spleens exclaimed “with an Elf init!”
That Elf is a fucker and then some. Da Imp is no novice and used the various strengths of his team well and it wasn’t long before the Alliance scored.
Second most hated Blood bowl player of all time and misdirected projectile, Barry Scott, scored the equaliser late in the first half having KO’d a halfling by landing on him and then catching a scattered pass. One thing about playing against a team that consists mostly of MA 5 and less, once you are past them with ball there is little they can do about it.
The second half was a walk over for the Alliance as Nuffle showed his/her colours. Double skulls, failed Sure Hands, a blizzard of rolled ones for the Coonts and the Alliance were comfortably ahead 3-1 in the 16th turn.
A consolation TTMTD by despised goblin Barry Scott helped to ease the pain, Scott levelled choosing side step.
Well played Da Imp, the Alliance are an excellent team and are going to get better.
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beefburger
Global Moderator
Supreme overlord
Posts: 320
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Post by beefburger on Nov 11, 2020 19:24:15 GMT
Short Cut (Haugster) 1 v 1 Fairies with Boots (Beefburger)
Fairly quiet game, Haugs tried to kill all mens i tried to dislodge the ball, we both overall failed.
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