valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
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Post by valis on Nov 17, 2020 10:56:41 GMT
Wollack is definitely a fucker. And now he got MB.... *Sad Face*
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selfy
Star Player
Wessex Dork
Posts: 707
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Post by selfy on Nov 17, 2020 18:03:38 GMT
Bro’kut means nothing to me. Everyone knows that Gimfag is the new hotness! Remember the Trash Hate Club? Gimfag is on the cusp of getting his own. Only on the cusp? I feel disappointed.
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wilgutspleens
Star Player
I am suffering from prescient nostalgia....the future's not what it used to be
Posts: 864
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Post by wilgutspleens on Nov 30, 2020 6:35:52 GMT
A tuneless whistle echoes around the locker room, an irritating flow of non musicality, devoid of melody or rhythm. Each note frustratingly just too sharp or flat, often more hiss than whistle, a whistle of the kind that skilled artisans use to indicate that an expensive quote is about to be announced, but of concerto length, constantly rising and falling and never a true note. The kind of whistling that raises the hairs on the back of the neck and drives any cognitive thought from the brain. The Whistler pauses often and at erratic, unpredictable moments, but never for long, for this is the whistle of the true sadist or the accidental sociopath. Follow the sound of the whistle, along a dark, dank tunnel and into a dimly lit changing room. Spare kit hangs forlornly from pegs on the walls, an old punctured ball sits in a puddle in the corner, a latrine door stands open and it’s from this cubicle that the oscillating ululation emanates. Barry Scott, despised goblin and second most hated Blood Bowl player in Funleague, is scrubbing the toilet bowl with a small pink tooth brush. He has a pot of Cilit BANG!(tm*) Gunk n Grime Grout n Clinker Restoration Paste and the vacant smile of a botched lobectomy. He is completely lost in the moment, he is approaching his own bleach based Nirvana. His cracked red fingers grip the brush firmly, he is working away at the last stubborn clump of festering ordure, his eyes meet on the bridge of his lumpish nose, meet, collide and rebound, his wrinkly, prune like face ,beaming like a chapped toe or a new graze. He is panting with happiness, tumescent with hygienic joy! From the shadows, two gleaming yellow eyes, mere ambre slits in the gloom, watch him. They narrow, shiftily look both ways, like a pantomime villain, and a cloudy black shape lifts and floats over to the cubicle, it hangs in the air like a redundant towel from an invisible peg. It shakes as with a silent giggle, pauses, for effect, extends one long finger and taps Barry on the shoulder. The little goblin turns towards the gloomy shade, their eyes meet. Barrys like two fried eggs left out on a plate in the rain, the Shade's like two broken razor blades, jagged like lightning motifs with black slitted pupils. “Baaaaarrrrrry” a drawn out hoarse whisper dripping with frost. Long, thin smoke like tendrils extend from the dark shape and stretch across the diminutive goblins repulsive visage, they enter his nostrils and his ears, his eyes revolve upwards until only the whites are showing, Barry slumps into a heap, the tooth brush falls from his lifeless fingers. Time passes. A passing spider walks over to the collapsed goblin, cocks a a leg, delivers a stream of spidery urine, spits and saunters off. Barry stirs. He rolls onto his back, coughs, slowly his eyes open , bright cadmium yellow eyes with black slitted pupils glare out at the world. Barry smiles, it’s not a happy face smile, it’s the smile of the cat with an injured mouse under it’s paw, the demented grin of a graphic novel villain, the sadistic smirk of the psychopvtge the cold smile of the serpent. His shoulders begin to shake, his body shudders, and Barry Scott laughs a long silent snigger like a demented hyena with laryngitis. Pulling himself to his feet , he staggers to the cracked mirror over the sink, looks into his reflection, gleaming harsh yellow eyes stare back. “Vid” he says quietly, the word dropping in to the room with a solid thud like a heavy lump of clotted blood, then louder “Vid!!” “Viiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiid!!!!!!” he roars and collapses into the manic paroxysmal chortling rolling gust of evil laughter that is most often written as “mwahahahahahaha” rising higher and more shrill until it is lost in the range only heard by dogs and bats and old ladies with ancient hearing aids until exhausted he falls flat on his back arms extended. His hand opens and from it rolls a once gleaming penny now green with age, crusted with verdigris, it rolls in ever smaller circles before falling flat on its side with a minute crash like a tiny cymbal. Barry opens one yellow gleaming eye “Look what it’s done to this penny” he whispers.
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Post by Da Imp on Nov 30, 2020 16:32:33 GMT
Oh no! What has happened to our beloved Barry!?!?
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valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
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Post by valis on Nov 30, 2020 18:46:38 GMT
He's a cunt. That's what's happened.
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selfy
Star Player
Wessex Dork
Posts: 707
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Post by selfy on Nov 30, 2020 19:31:19 GMT
He's a cunt. That's what's happened. That happened ages ago. What has just happened?
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Post by boo1964 on Dec 4, 2020 14:49:12 GMT
It was only a skull fracture, sadly no death. In a match that wasn't a Match, that shouldn't have been a Match, than became a Match. If that makes no sense it could be due to the skull fracture.
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wilgutspleens
Star Player
I am suffering from prescient nostalgia....the future's not what it used to be
Posts: 864
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Post by wilgutspleens on Dec 4, 2020 15:41:52 GMT
It was only a skull fracture, sadly no death. In a match that wasn't a Match, that shouldn't have been a Match, than became a Match. If that makes no sense it could be due to the skull fracture. !
and yes he is a cunt, a stupid,irritating gormless cunt , who only wants to help a bit by cleaning up here an there, he doesn't even know what Blood Bowl is! So far this season he has caused one casualty and scored three touch downs and now he has a broken skull and he doesn't even know he's playing thats what kind of a cunt he is! Hes just out there trying to clean things.
And now he has skull fracture in a match that shouldn't have been a match but then became a match that wasn't!
But something much worse is happening to Barry, he is changing, some deep dark horror lives in side him and is growing, feeding, becoming...........
Look out Fun League, something has dirtied his penny and Barry is changing
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Post by boo1964 on Dec 4, 2020 18:02:24 GMT
It was only a skull fracture, sadly no death. In a match that wasn't a Match, that shouldn't have been a Match, than became a Match. If that makes no sense it could be due to the skull fracture. !
and yes he is a cunt, a stupid,irritating gormless cunt , who only wants to help a bit by cleaning up here an there, he doesn't even know what Blood Bowl is! So far this season he has caused one casualty and scored three touch downs and now he has a broken skull and he doesn't even know he's playing thats what kind of a cunt he is! Hes just out there trying to clean things.
And now he has skull fracture in a match that shouldn't have been a match but then became a match that wasn't!
But something much worse is happening to Barry, he is changing, some deep dark horror lives in side him and is growing, feeding, becoming...........
Look out Fun League, something has dirtied his penny and Barry is changing
YIKES, I ask you what could be worse than a stupid, irritating, gormless cunt?
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wilgutspleens
Star Player
I am suffering from prescient nostalgia....the future's not what it used to be
Posts: 864
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Post by wilgutspleens on Dec 6, 2020 7:14:55 GMT
and yes he is a cunt, a stupid,irritating gormless cunt , who only wants to help a bit by cleaning up here an there, he doesn't even know what Blood Bowl is! So far this season he has caused one casualty and scored three touch downs and now he has a broken skull and he doesn't even know he's playing thats what kind of a cunt he is! Hes just out there trying to clean things.
And now he has skull fracture in a match that shouldn't have been a match but then became a match that wasn't!
But something much worse is happening to Barry, he is changing, some deep dark horror lives in side him and is growing, feeding, becoming...........
Look out Fun League, something has dirtied his penny and Barry is changing
YIKES, I ask you what could be worse than a stupid, irritating, gormless cunt? A stupid irritating gormless cunt possessed by a dark spirit of hatred spite and bitterness, a spirit so cold you will get Frost bite just reading about it. Frostbite of the soul,...
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selfy
Star Player
Wessex Dork
Posts: 707
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Post by selfy on Dec 7, 2020 22:12:03 GMT
Bro’Kut has rolled into +AG. Couldn’t refuse. He’s now handling ball carrier duties.
Gimfag has horns on his two heads!
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valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
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Post by valis on Dec 8, 2020 7:01:12 GMT
Bro’Kut has rolled into +AG. Couldn’t refuse. He’s now handling ball carrier duties. Gimfag has horns on his two heads! Boasting. It's almost like you want them to be kicked to death.
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selfy
Star Player
Wessex Dork
Posts: 707
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Post by selfy on Dec 8, 2020 7:03:35 GMT
Bro’Kut has rolled into +AG. Couldn’t refuse. He’s now handling ball carrier duties. Gimfag has horns on his two heads! Boasting. It's almost like you want them to be kicked to death. Merely providing a public information broadcast.
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Post by nearly on Dec 8, 2020 22:09:02 GMT
Why the fuck is Serioas from Hive of Scum and villainy not on the bounty list. The fucker is currently making cage breaks with four dodge rolls past a prehensile tail..
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valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
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Post by valis on Dec 9, 2020 16:59:45 GMT
Why the fuck is Serioas from Hive of Scum and villainy not on the bounty list. The fucker is currently making cage breaks with four dodge rolls past a prehensile tail.. I see you've nominated him. Jolly good!
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