valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
|
Post by valis on Sept 21, 2020 19:10:55 GMT
Place them here
|
|
|
Post by haugster on Sept 23, 2020 7:46:36 GMT
Felt bad for spleens smalluns in yesterdays bout. Most of the match, most things went to shit for the littlings and the biguns did very little to help. The dwarves could knock them about as they liked, pretty much. Good thing there was no mighty blow about, or this could have gotten really ugly.
Oh yeah, and the match went 3-0 in the dwarves' favour.
|
|
wilgutspleens
Star Player
I am suffering from prescient nostalgia....the future's not what it used to be
Posts: 864
|
Post by wilgutspleens on Sept 23, 2020 10:28:19 GMT
Short Cut 3-0 The Borelocks
This game had everything! Rain! Death! More rain! More death! There were big lumbering stupid things that spent a lot of the game being stupid, there were tiny wee, little cute things, with big soft kitteny eyes, just trying to play the ball and have a good clean game and then there were these awful beardy things with a skill called tackle that is the most anti-gnoblar skill yet known to Blood Bowl.
It was a game of two halves that were both the same but at different times.
Failing the first dodge of the game seemed to set the pattern for this shit storm of Chorfness as the Short Cunt proved to be the complete antidote to stunty titchy dodgy gob types.
The best moment was watching Teeny Borelocks injure a Hob with a “three dice you choose” blitz and then celebrate his achievement with a successful leap for no purpose other than the simple joy of leaping high into the air like an Elven Wardancer (but less showy), that Gnoblar is going places, you may be sure of that (Intensive Care, Mortuary, Crematorium)
|
|
valis
Global Moderator
Posts: 993
|
Post by valis on Sept 23, 2020 11:48:42 GMT
I KNEW leap was the correct skill choice! where's Selfy to eat his words?
|
|
selfy
Star Player
Wessex Dork
Posts: 707
|
Post by selfy on Sept 23, 2020 20:02:21 GMT
I KNEW leap was the correct skill choice! where's Selfy to eat his words? I said he doesn't need leap if he hides behind the ogre all day. If Spleens has stopped being a coward and now throws 3d uphill blocks for days, then I believe I have provided a valuable public service! I'd like to see a leap into a fruity, gangfoul, please! I mean when do you ever see a wardancer leaping into a foul? They should be ashamed to be called such. If one gets sent off, you've still got another! For shame! Note to self: next project - fouling wood elf team
|
|
|
Post by Da Imp on Sept 27, 2020 20:36:44 GMT
Blackspine Manticores 3 vs 1 Ride the Bone Train
The Manticores made a triumphant return to the Fun League with a solid win over the Bone Train. Mistress Pain made sure to score her contractually obliged TD and cut a particularly fetching figure in the fresh albino Skink hide thigh-high boots. Despite their supposed lack of eyes, the Bone Train players were clearly distracted the darling of the crowd, as was evidenced by their total lack of ability to play in the second half after an unfortunate uniform failure left Mistress Pain topless immediately after the kick-off. The Manticores took full advantage of the sudden rigidity of the undead players to score 2 TDs in the second half and even managed to cause 3 casualties in the process - 2 dead skeletons fortunately managed to piece themselves back together but a mummy suffered a smashed knee. The Dark Elves escaped unscathed from the encounter.
|
|
|
Post by Da Imp on Sept 27, 2020 20:38:15 GMT
Thanks for the game Smiffums, your luck really turned sour in that 2nd half. I think you had 3 turns in a row where you did almost nothing.
|
|
|
Post by Da Imp on Oct 4, 2020 22:19:11 GMT
Metallizon - 2 vs 1 - Blackspine Manticores A game that could have had any result ended up in a win to the Amazons. With the Manticores dominating the first half, going up from an early TD and being inches away from going up 2-0 - stopped first by a well timed lightning bolt, then a couple of failed passes, the Amazons took advantage of an unlikely opportunity to score a play of the week TD right at the end of the half. With things level a 1-1 the game was wide open.
The second half went from bad to worse for the Dark Elves though as first Mistress Pain had to leave the field for a new boot fitting appointment (suggestions that she was KO'd have been denied by the Manticores' management) which left the team without their leader and taliswoman. The boot fitting did allow Mistress Pain to level up her movement at least. Then in quick succession another 4 Dark Elves left the field in various stages of distress (no long term injuries have been reported though) leaving the team out numbered 11 to 6 and the Amazons in possession of the ball. Some valiant attempts to sack the ball carrier failed and the Amazons sauntered down field to score the winning TD.
Mistress Pain's new line of sportswear can be purchased in all upper class dungeons across the Old World. Get you pair now and stick it to the opposition.
|
|
|
Post by haugster on Oct 7, 2020 21:16:23 GMT
Match between the Short Cut chaos dwarfs and the undead Snuggles and Kittens has been played to a 2-0 win for the CDs. The undead caused some trouble and pulled of some plays, but hobgobs saved the day for the chaos side.
|
|
|
Post by Da Imp on Oct 13, 2020 20:44:36 GMT
Blackspine Manticores - 5 vs 1 - The BorelocksA hattrick by Mistress Pain saw the Dark Elves cruise to a massive win over the hapless stunties. But if not for the intervention of a quick thinking fan, things could have turned out vastly differently. Early in the first half Mistress Pain suffered a boot malfunction that resulted in the stiletto heel getting lodged down her throat. How you ask? Well there were some very revealing, some might say explicit, Cabalvision footage of the accident but it was all stolen by a hooded figure (with a rather fetching behind) after the game. But back to the action where a prone Mistress pain was choking to death before a fan ran onto the pitch to clear her throat and give her the kiss of life. For his troubles the lucky fan had his tongue bitten out by his Mistress and his groin permanently inverted by her delicious knee. No doubt he will be dining out on this story for decades to come - if he was able to speak that is.
|
|
|
Post by haugster on Oct 13, 2020 21:59:41 GMT
The chorfs, as the nonbelievers sometimes call them, ended up winning tonights bout against Sybaris' plagueridden Nurgle 1 to 0. There were LOTS of blocks from both teams, and a few fouls by some sneaky hobgobs as well, but there was only 1 cas for each side. The CDs managed to score on turn 16 after countering the Nurgles drive helped by a failed block by the beast, after having failed an easy dodge for a first half TD turn 8.
|
|
wilgutspleens
Star Player
I am suffering from prescient nostalgia....the future's not what it used to be
Posts: 864
|
Post by wilgutspleens on Oct 14, 2020 8:07:52 GMT
Blackspine Manticores - 5 vs 1 - The Borelocks
This game had the kind of shennanigans you only find when you introduce a few bombs to an Elf team
|
|
selfy
Star Player
Wessex Dork
Posts: 707
|
Post by selfy on Oct 14, 2020 9:39:49 GMT
Blackspine Manticores - 5 vs 1 - The Borelocks This game had the kind of shennanigans you only find when you introduce a few bombs to an Elf team Well, fuck me!
|
|
wilgutspleens
Star Player
I am suffering from prescient nostalgia....the future's not what it used to be
Posts: 864
|
Post by wilgutspleens on Oct 14, 2020 12:21:17 GMT
Blackspine Manticores - 5 vs 1 - The Borelocks This game had the kind of shennanigans you only find when you introduce a few bombs to an Elf team Well, fuck me! That's what Mistress Pain said bu then she turned down the troll , the ogre and all the gnoblars, She did go off some where quiet with the treeman tho and later he brushed everyone off "Leaf me alone " he said "I am sapped" No one twigged what he was barking on about tho until she appeared, rooted about in his nether regions and took a bough
|
|
|
Post by Da Imp on Oct 14, 2020 13:06:25 GMT
Blackspine Manticores - 5 vs 1 - The Borelocks This game had the kind of shennanigans you only find when you introduce a few bombs to an Elf team Man those bombs were fun they were being tossed around all over the place. Interceptions and fumbled pass fun ensued.
|
|